Pumps
Last Saturday I went to my sorority formal, which is just like Prom, only with more alcohol and less coke in the bathroom. We’re college students, we can no longer afford coke.
In addition to looking awkward because I have inadvertently gained 15 pounds, I also looked awkward because I did not really want to be there. While getting drunk is always fun, getting drunk in a formal dress and heels sucks.
I made my dress, partly for fun and mostly because I like the attention that the statement “I made my own dress” brings. I am an attention whore and I can admit it. People get so wrapped up in themselves, especially when they are in formal wear. The downside to this dress was the fact that the slit up the side was, well, homemade and therefore kept getting longer and longer. By the end of the night, I was showing 5 more inches of leg than I was at the beginning.
Also, there was the shoe Nazi. Very early in the evening, before my chicken dinner and before I began sobering up, a girl stepped on glass on the dace floor. As a result no one could take their shoes off. I was wearing 4 inch extremely cute pumps. I cannot walk now as result of my callouses from dancing in the cute pumps.
Damn pumps.
